Friday, January 14, 2011
NTC again, lovely!
It's been exactly seven days since Joseph left for NTC the second time. I don't remember all of my feelings from the first time but I do know it has been a lot different this time. The first time was summer of '08. While he was gone I was working at Dara's gas station and living in Manhattan. My family and friends and I were planning Joseph and I's wedding. As you could imagine we were more than busy. I can say I was more anxious last time. Although I still sometimes say I am new to this Army life, in '08 I was way more immature to the life I have adjusted to now. I would let things get to me a lot more. When they changed dates of them coming home I would bawl and bawl and bawl. This time around I am telling myself, I will not let my heart get set on a date of return until it gets closer and more realistic. I have a hard time not being able to go by a plan. Being married to the military, that is a bad way to look at things. You have to be ready for things to change up to the minute of it happening. One thing that is different this go around is they had to turn in their phones before they went out to "the box" So I have been communicating with Joseph up until last night when he had to turn in his phone. They told him they will be out in "the box" for 10-15 days. My first reaction...AHHHHHHHH. The first thought that came to my mind was, "the longest I went without ANY form of communication even during deployment was 4-5 days". It just doesn't seem like a realistic exercise to me. But that's his job and I have to be able to snap out of my attitude in a timely manner or it will only cause strain on our relationship as a couple. As for NTC overall, I don't think I have allowed myself to even go near my feelings of missing Joe or realizing he's gone for a while. I am just keeping my self busy with friends, gym, homework and up until today, knowing that at one point during the day I was going to get to hear from him. Today is day 1 of "the box" so I am going into it with a positive mindset. Going to the gym, socializing with friends, doing some homework and watching lots of episodes of tv shows off my dvr and netflix :).